La Ragazza Bianconera: Fangirl Guide to the World Cup Part 2

Okay, so since I have no ties to any other team in the World Cup, I will most likely know a lot less about certain players and have a lot less hate for most of them. I think I'm just going to go by group now, so I don't forget who I've done and whatnot. So without further ado, Group A!

South Africa
Goalkeepers:

Itumeleng Khune

He plays his club football at the Kaizer Chiefs in South Africa and for that club name alone, he gets my vote! He's actually kinda cute, so he is acceptable for fangirling, Congrats!

He also plays his club football in South Africa for the Orlando Pirates! He's a definite cutie and totally gets the seal of approval! Yay South Africa! :)

Shu-Aib Walters

Ok, uhmm...they were doing soo well up until now! I'm sure he has his share of fangirls, but he's just not my cup of tea. Sorry Shu-Aib, I just can't approve.

So far, South Africa are doing alright! 2/3 ain't bad!

Defence!

Siboniso Gaxa

So, I really don't know about the hair, but he has pretty eyes, sooo he gets a half approval for that:)

Matthew Booth

Oh, no, I'm sorry. I just, I can't. He does have pretty coloured eyes, but I can't.

Lucas Thwala

Hehe aww he's adorable! He looks like he would be the nicest guy ever! He gets full marks for that!:)

Aaron Mokoena

He has a nice smile and he's cute. He's approved.

Bongani Khumalo

Why you look so sad? You're going to the World Cup! Be happy! I don't like his sadness, sorry no points for you.

Siyabonga Sangweni

His name is Siyabonga! How can you NOT love a guy with a name like that!? Anyways, he gets half marks for his name, but due to the lack of photographic evidence, that is all I can give.

Tsepo Masilela

Hmm...yeahh I don't think so. Sorry:(

Anele Ngcongca

He's a cutie, I approve of fangirling :)

Lucas Thwala...wait, FIFA wtf are you talking about? I swear we already had him? Okay, I'm just going to move on....

So the defence gets 4/8. South Africa, you started off so well! What happened?!

Midfield!

Steven Pienaar

So many of you may recognize him because he plays in the EPL for Everton! He's cute, he's approved!

Teko Modise

Sadness is unattractive! Be happy you are going to the World Cup and smile! No points for you.

Siphiwe Tshabalala

Yeah, I don't think so, but I do love the last name man!

Reneilwe Letsholonyane

I don't think so, but you have seriously fierce eyes man! Tyra would be proud ;)

Thanduyise Khuboni

So I'm pretty sure that's him, but Google Images seemed a bit confused..anyways, I don't think I can give him any fangirl points, sorry! Lack of photographic evidence is annoying:(

Kagisho Dikgaco

He's kinda adorable...like a teddy bear!! So he gets half points :)

Macbeth Sibaya

OMG His hair is amazing!! He gets half points for that! FTW!

Surprise Moriri

ZOMG HIS NAME IS SURPRISE!! WHAT?! THAT'S AMAZING! Plus he does work for charity apparently, thus earning himself an approval!

So their mids get a rating of 3/8. :( Was I too harsh?

Attackers:

Katlego Mphela

Hmm...no approval, sorry man!

Bernard Parke

He looks so young! And adorable! He gets a point for that!

Siyabonga Nomvete

So he has a cool name, so he gets half a point!

1.5/3 for the strikers, not bad! There you have it people, your host country of this years World Cup! Up next: Mexico!! I want to apologize in advance if I get some of the positions mixed up for the Mexican team because FIFA's list doesn't list positions for some strange reason!

Goal Keepers

Oscar Perez

He's actually kinda attractive in that angry biker kinda way. He gets the approval!

Guillermo Ochoa

He has pretty hair so he gets half a point. That's it.

Luis Ernesto Michel

He's cute and he has his name on his gloves, so he's legit! He gets a point!

That's 2.5/3! Wow Mexico, that's impressive.

Defence!

Rafael Marquez

Ok so he gets a point. We don't even have to talk about this one.

Israel Castro

I don't think so....

Ricardo Osorio

He's kinda got a bit of that Latino flare, we'll give him half a point!:)

Francisco Rodriguez

Hot damn, he is approved. For sure. Man I need to start watching more PSV matches!

Carlos Salcido

Sorry, but following Francisco really isn't helping you. I guess you can get half a point...

Hector Moreno

Hot damn, I need to go to Mexico! I approve!!

So that's 4/ 6! Good work!

Midfield!

Paul Aguilar

He's adorable! Half a point!

Efrain Juarez

Ok, no.

Jonny Magallon

I don't know about him, in some pictures he looks great and in some he doesn't....I'll give him half a point for trying:)

Jorge Torres Nilo

So young! So adorable! He's approved for fangirling, as long as your ok with jailbait ;)

Andres Guardado

I don't think this one's gonna happen, sorry bud!

Gerardo Torrado

LOL Oh the hair! Anyways, I like the tan, but that's not enough to earn a point sorry man!

Giovani dos Santos

Good player, but that's about it. No fangirl love from me

Adolfo Bautista

No.

So the midfield scores 2/8! Wow, Mexico you really need to work on that midfield of yours!

Strikers!

Pablo Barrera

I don't think soo...

Alberto Medina

Yupp, he's approved :)

Cuauhtemoc Blanco

Uhm no thanks...

Carlos Vela

Look at the cuteness! I approve!

Javier Hernandez

He looks 12! I can't approve this...I think its illegal...

Guillermo Franco

He's kinda cute actually. I'll give him half a point:)

That means the strikers score 2.5/6. Mexico, you let me down! Lucky for you your defence saved your asses!! Up next: URUGUAY!!!

Goalkeepers:

Fernando Muslera

Sorry, no points for you Muslera. I have my reasons!!

Juan-Guillermo Castillo

He's kinda cute, but is that a unibrow?! He gets half a point for amazing hair.

Martin Silva

Ok no.

So far not so good for Uruguay. They get 0.5/3 for the goalkeepers!

Defence:

Diego Lugano

He gets half a mark because he's good looking, but I just don't know....

Diego Godin

Ok this isn't fair! He plays for Villarreal and I have a soft spot for them. I'm sorry darling, I just can't give you the fangirl approval :(

Andres Scotti

He seems to be a good looking guy, I'll give him the seal of approval!

Jorge Fucile

No points, but he does have nice eyes:)

Martin Caceres

Sure there were hundreds of other pictures I could've choesn, but I don't think they would be as effective as this one. I am a big supporter of this guy and I hope he can stay at Juventus! I approve!!!

Mauricio Victorino

He's cute, I approve.

Maximiliano Pereira

Yeah, no.

The defence scores 3.5/7! I guess thats not bad...

Midfield!

Walter Gargano

So he's cute, he's approved.

Egidio Arevalo-Rios

Ok that's even too angry for me. Sorry man...

Sebastian Eguren

Holy crap yes! Whatever the question was, the answer is always yes with him! Gorgeous. I approve for sure!

Diego Perez

No, sorry man. Maybe its because your following Sebastian....

Alvaro Pereira

Another no.

Alvaro Fernandez

Ok definitely not. Is that a mullet?!

Ignacio Gonzalez

I don't think so.

Nicolas Lodeiro

Ok, he's cute, he gets half a point:)

So the mids get 2.5/ 8. What?! Wow, inject the pretty please!

Attack!

Sebastian Fernandez

That's more like it!! I definitely approve of him and his smile!

Luis Suarez

He gets half a point, he's cute enough:)

Diego Forlan

Well, when you put it like that...APPROVED!

Sebastian Abreu

Oh the unibrow. No, sorry.

Edinson Cavani

Gorgeous hair. Half a point.

So the Uruguay strikers get a score of 3/5! That's an improvement! Good work! Next: France! For the record, I really don't like France, so don't expect high scores:)

Goalkeepers:

Hugo Lloris

Oh lord, he looks like a mouse. No. Just no.

Steve Mandanda

Even he agrees - AWWWH HEELLLL NAWWW! Sorry man. Not gonna happen.

Cedric Carrasso

Dammit! Why is he cute!? Fine. You get ONE!

So their goalies get 1/3. They are lucky Mr. Carrasso saved them.

Defence!

Bacary Sagna

I'm sorry, this is real, right? No. What? No.

Patrice Evra

He can rock a suit, half a point for him.

William Gallas

Sexy face ain't workin' for ya.

Eric Abidal

Yeah, no. The whole angry sexy thing is definitely not working for ya.

Sebastien Squillaci

He's got a pretty smile. For that he gets half a point.

Marc Planus

DAMMIT! WHYYY IS THERE PRETTY?! Fine, you get a point!!

Gael Clichy

Sometimes scars are sexy. Yours isn't. No love for you.

Anthony Reveillere

Man, this isn't even fair anymore! Fine. a point for you!

The defence has a total score of 3/8! Ha! Take that! Stupid France!

Midfield:

Alou Diarra

Deer in headlights, not so much.

Jeremy Toulalan

Holy chest hair! Its actually now neck hair I think. Yeah, bud, sorry, its a no.

Florent Malouda

Uhmmm, I don't think so.

Yoann Gourcuff

Ok so I know I'm gonna get LOTS of fangirl hate on this one, but I really can't find him attractive! I'm sorry. I don't see it. Just too feminine I guess...

Abou Diaby